If you follow me on twitter you may (or may not) have seen my little outburst in defence of Robin Williams and all sufferers of depression and mental illnesses after hearing the offensive and inappropriate opinions of a radio presenter called Alan Brazil.
For those of you who haven’t heard what…
I’m feeling down and want to get my thoughts out. I have been struggling with my IBS pretty much constantly since we started the process of buying a house, which isn’t a surprise because it’s brought on by stress and anxiety. I wouldn’t mind, but I feel so guilty when I’m not well enough to go into work. There’s a constant bad feeling there, and it’s probably because I can’t explain it to everyone, so I’m hoping this will help a little.
I feel like I’ll be judged for having more sick days than anyone else in my team/dept, even though I’m sure if they understood what was wrong with me they wouldn’t judge, but they don’t.
I’m holding on to the hope that I will get better when I have moved house, but what if I don’t? This is going to be around forever, every time something big happens in life, or anything which makes me worried or stressed. It doesn’t help that I then end up worrying about work, and thinking about what I’d do if they finally get fed up of it and take disciplinary action. I have had conversations with my manager and don’t feel he would do this, but it goes through my mind every time I have to call up and tell them I won’t be in.
I suppose I just feel like I’m letting people down, I’m a liability and more effort than I’m worth.
Carol - 4.14 | The Grove
You fight.. and fight it. You don’t give up. And then one day you just change. We all change.
I love Carol